So Proud of you Big Girl!!

Emotions have been running kind of high in my household as of late.  This last few weeks we have given our condolences to some families that have lost their HPE babies.  It is heartbreaking to know of how little time they got to have with their angel babies!  And on the other end of the spectrum emotions have been high as we continue to prepare Eva for school.  It is this thought of school and friends and everyday preschool kid stuff that just fills my heart with gratitude to have Eva!  As a stay home mom, I feel like I keep my babies away, all to myself, I am their best friend, their playmate and then the time comes to set them free to make their friends and spend time with other people.  I'm ready and I'm not, I'm ready for her to make friends, oh how that thought warms my heart, to think of her "inviting" friends for parties and play dates!  I'm not ready to just drop her off and trust someone with her.  I admit I am very protective of Eva, I take other's comments in stride about NEEDING to leave her for me time and how we just NEED as mothers to have time away from our kids.  Although it is not too far fetched and I understand why its important to some (and even me) but I guess, as I have posted before, I did a lot of that when I was single.  I worked a lot, I did a lot of charity work, I had a lot of good times.  This is what I asked for and not in a bad way, I never fully knew how much I desired motherhood until I had these kids.  I'm indulging in this time in my life, I stay home, I love it, I loved work too when I had to do that and I enjoyed me me me me me when I could do that.  But now, I'm grateful and thankful to my husband who shares my views and values me staying home.  Someday my time for all my indulgences will come again, when I'm ready.  I have a very blessed life, it is quite different than my life before, I have little material things but many more riches!